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  • Writer's pictureAlison Bulman

How to address the Mental Load Problem in Relationships


A common problem for couples is the unequal distribution of tasks required to run a household and family, and the resulting resentment that poisons the relationship.


When women (or men, whoever is carrying the heavier load), struggle with this invisible mental load, it wreaks havoc on intimacy.


Couples need to make time to meet once a week, write down these invisible tasks and split them up evenly.


“Keeping a household running smoothly takes a lot of effort. There are the more obvious physical tasks like cooking meals, taking out the garbage, folding laundry and picking the kids up from school. But it also requires a whole bunch of behind-the-scenes planning, organizing, anticipating of needs, decision-making and delegating known as the mental load — an invisible kind of work.”




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