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  • Alison Bulman

No More Buts


Here’s a verbal tweek that can make you more effective.


When explaining your point of view and stating something positive like I love you, and you have a second point, don’t start the next statement with BUT.


Instead use the word AND.


BUT discounts what you just said. AND includes it.


For example. I love you but you’re often late. Sounds like being late makes you not love the person.


Saying I love you AND sometimes you’re late means you love the person despite their lateness.


Watch in general for how BUT is negating what you just said. Try replacing it with AND, you’ll likely get a better response.

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