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Love Found, Love Kept 

A Four Week Group Course to Stop Unconsciously Sabotaging Your Relationship

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You found the relationship — now learn how not to sabotage it.

 

NEXT GROUP:

Four Wednesdays

6:00–8:00 PM

November 4, 11, 18 and December 2 (no meeting Nov 25, Thanksgiving Eve).

Led by Alison Bulman, LCSW 

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"Talking is the most dangerous thing we do."
Suggested reading: Getting the Love You Want
— Harville Hendrix, PhD

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WHO THIS GROUP IS FOR

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Everyone is welcome:

singles preparing for their next relationship, one person from a couple and couples together who want

to strengthen the relationship they have.

 

This is a Straight and LGBTQIA+ affirming space,

welcoming people of every ethnic background and

relationship style.

 

In a group, you hear that others share your struggles. Learning from

each other's shares and vulnerability empowers us to

practice opening up in our lives.

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WHAT TO EXPECT

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Week 1 · Nov 4 — The Hot Seat: Projections and the Stories We Tell Ourselves

  • Introductions and the Hot Seat exercise

  • The relationship vision exercise

  • Negativity and the Gottman Relationship Bank Account

 

Week 2 · Nov 11 — Zen Speed: The Lovitation® Method

  • Creating space by going slow , and the miracles of staying in the present moment

  • Maintaining human intimacy in the digital age

  • Ground rules 1–5 for mindful communication

  • Validation and curiosity before sharing your perspective, and Magic Questions

  • Paired practice: Slow-down dialogue (listen, then reflect) · Magic Questions swap

 

Week 3 · Nov 18 — Don't Sweep It Under the Rug: Two Sturdy Trees

  • Goal: Two sturdy trees: emotional safety that holds up under stress, even mid-argument.

  • Ground rules 6–10 for mindful communication

  • Honesty is essential for trust

  • Resentment's toxicity, and escalation's harms and what to do about them

  • The unconscious damage of defensiveness (with Insta reels to illustrate)

  • Blame and shame's hidden insidiousness

  • Paired practice: Lift the rug (share what you've held back) · Pause button (stop escalation)

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Week 4 · Dec 2 — Kiss and Make Up: Old Wounds, New Habits

  • Childhood wounds showing up in adult relationships

  • Our untrue projections onto a partner: how to spot them and ask if they're true

  • Landmines: denying, minimizing, and intellectualizing

  • What's lost when we try to change or fix each other's experience

  • How to make up, plus conclusion and discussion: review gains and insights

  • Paired practice: Reality check ("Is my story true?") · Spark Lovitation® (make-up practice)

 

"We are born in relationship, we are wounded

in relationship, and we can be healed in

relationship."

— Harville Hendrix, PhD

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